| 1. | Category: Dead and dying jokes  |
| A chemist, a shopkeeper and a teacher were sentenced to death by firing squad. The chemist was taken from his cell and as the soldiers took aim he shouted "Avalanche!" The soldiers panicked and in the confusion the chemist escaped. The shop... more
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| 2. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| Whats a zombies favorite pop song? Dead sails in the sunset.... more
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| 3. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| This elderly Newfoundland fisherman is on his deathbed and summons his 3 sons to his bedside. "Well boys, the time is near, and when I pass Id like to be buried at sea." So the boys agreed. A few days after his passing, the local front page... more
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| 4. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| A chap went up to the counter in the library and said, "Have you got any books about committing suicide?"The librarian said, "Yes. Take a look over there, somewhere on the middle shelf."The chap came back a few moments later and said, "I ca... more
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| 5. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| Teacher: What can you tell me about the Dead Sea?Pupil: Dead ?, I didnt even know he was sick !... more
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| 6. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| When a knight in armour was killed in battle, what sign did they put on his grave ?Rust in peace !... more
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| 7. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| Did you hear about the man who left his job at the mortuary? It was a dead end job.... more
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| 8. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| Ive been e-mailing William Shakespeare.William Shakespeares dead, silly.No wonder he hasnt replied.... more
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| 9. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| Vampire 1: "I once went so long without fresh blood that I nearly died." Vampire 2: "How awful!" Vampire 1: "Yes. Fortunately, I found some in the neck of time."... more
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| 10. | Category: Dead and dying jokes |
| There was a great loss today in the entertainment world. The man who wrote the song "Hokey Pokey" died. What was really horrible is that they had trouble keeping the body in the casket. They put his left leg in....Well, you know the rest.... more
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