The Jokes Network

SUBSCRIBE ::

Enter your email for our daily jokes newsletter:

Viewing Joke:
Category:	Bar jokes beer booze and fun
Date Added:	11/10/2007
Rating:
Views:	136

Joke:	The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried over time (weight-lifters, longshoremen, etc.) but nobody could do it. One day this scrawny little man came into the bar, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit, and said in a tiny squeaky voice " Id like to try the bet" After the laughter had died down, the bartender said OK, grabbed a lemon, and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little man. But the crowds laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass!! As the crowd cheered, the bartend er paid the $1000, and asked the little man "what do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight-lifter, or what?" The scrawny little man replied "I work for the IRS."

	Add to del.icio.us Digg this Reddit

More Bar Jokes Beer Booze And Fun:

1.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	A man walks in to a bar and says to the bartenter " Give me twenty shots of your best singlemalt scotch quick!"] The bartender pours the shots, and the man drinks them as fast as he can. The bartender says " Wow. I never saw anybady drink t... more
2.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole because the general sp... more
3.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "Ill bet you $10 hell jump," said the first guy. "Bet you $10 he wont," said th... more
4.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	Contrary to what people say, you can indeed drink to relax.Of course sometimes, you get so calm, you cant move.... more
5.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	A man walks into a pub and sits down next to a man with a dog at his feet. "Does your dog bite?""No."A few minutes later the dog takes a huge chunk out of his leg."I thought you said your dog didnt bite!" the man says indignantly."Thats not... more
6.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.... more
7.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	Every night, after dinner, a man took off for the local tavern. He spent the whole evening there, and arrived home very drunk around midnight each night. He always had trouble getting his key into the keyhole and getting the door opened. Hi... more
8.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	A drunk stammers out of a bar and runs into two priests. He runs up to them and says, Im Jesus Christ. The first priest says, No, son, Im Jesus Christ. So the drunk says it to the second priest. The second priest replies, No, son, Im Jesus... more
9.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	A cop is staking out a bar for drunk drivers. At closing time, he sees a guy stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and fumble for his keys for five minutes. When he finally gets in, it takes him another five minutes to get the key in th... more
10.	Category: Bar jokes beer booze and fun
	Three vampires walk into a bar and sit down at a table. The waitress comes over and asks the first vampire what he would like. The first vampire responds, "I vould like some blood."The waitress turns to the second vampire and asks what he w... more